Granpaw's Journal

Well in the midst of what seems to be a December thaw, where the weather takes a bounce upward (temporarily of course)…
I would like to send a holiday greeting to all the folks who actually see this blog, they number way up in the single digits and show just how much people are thinking of me these days…;0(

As for me….I’ve taken on a new life over on Facebook and have become a multi-billionaire (temporarily of course) and whacked more of my criminally minded peers than all of the FBI CIA or BATF combined (fantasy of course).

But back to my reason for this post….

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!!!

On another website, we are in the midst of discussing scenarios and theories of epic proportions all with a doomsday theme.
While those threads are (to me) extremely interesting, I want to start a diffferent discussion.

Call it maudlin, or ramblin, or senility if you will, but here goes…

It’s only a week from our fall event and I for one am sad to see the end of another summer…
I look at each spring season as a chance to do some things I want to do, then it comes and goes so fast I miss the boat again.
Something that lurks at the edge of my mind is the thought of “what was it that I did get to do?”, and believe it or not, sometimes I even remember some.

So…in no particular order, here are ten things:

1. I rode a harley…yeah on the back but better than no ride a’tall!
2. I gained a great-grandchild….(though this one makes me feel a tad older).
3. I found out “Jerimiah Weed” was not a sixties rock group…but it’ll kick your ass anyway!
4. I found out (in my case) Rum won’t.
5. I found out I really like Charley and Kristin (in spite of my prior impression)…and yeah..I like their rug rats too.
6. I planted, grew, nurtured, and gummed the hell out of my first tomato.
7. I found out I can still cut a rug…(when I got a purty gal to lean on).
8. I found out my cooler is possessed…(there is always exactly 5 Caronas in there).
9. I found out the “granpaw & the scalp boot boys” are not a sixties rock group…but we’ll kick your ass anyway!
10. I found out Wounded Knee will too…(even if it breaks her laig).

Having been on the politically incorrect side of all 3 local, and 1 national news paper, tv reporters and talking heads, I can see with perfect clarity how this “joke” sent by a friend could be more truth than fiction.

A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.

The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.

A reporter has seen the whole scene, and addressing the biker, says
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“Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted, I felt it was right“.

“Well, I’ll make sure this won’t go unnoticed. I’m a journalist, you know, and tomorrow’s papers will have this on the first page. What motorcycle do you ride?”

“A Harley Davidson“.

The journalist leaves.
The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on first page:

BIKER GANG MEMBER
ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT
AND STEALS HIS LUNCH

Turn this.. Into this..

Visit roundpic.com and submit your own avatar, or picture, then download the pic with rounded corners…Great for a custom look to your pics or avatars.
Free.

Hey Smurf…Hey Jimbo…Hard choice, but which bike do you think I’d prefer to share?
Or this one

• As of noon today, I am now a great grandfather…
  Hannah Ann Wallen was born today to my Grandson Larry and his wife Tina in southern Wisconsin.
• The packers play seattle on a station that I can’t get on the television

I found this poem authored by Thomas and Sandra Hookham on the “Bee” website in Phillips Wisc. I thought it pretty much said it the way I see it too.

---

The states all sued big tobacco for adding addictive stuff,
But now that money is gone and they’re saying it wasn’t enough.

They sued in court on my behalf, But then greedily took all the dough,
Now I have a hard time distinguishing If my government is friend or foe.

So what did they decide to do, After getting those millions of bucks?
They took my money to balance the budget, And I think that kind of sucks.

There is no money to help me quit, As was promised with conviction,
No funds were made available, To help in ending my addiction.

Now adding insult to injury, Wisconsin is on the attack,
Their idea is to help me stop, By taxing an extra buck a pack.

If you want to raise taxes And still be everyone’s friend,
Just pick out a national “problem” And tax it to an end.

If the government was honestly Just looking out for me,
Then wouldn’t the patches, gum and stuff Be provided all for free?

Watching me get beaten down, For some might seem quite funny,
For government—it’s not about me, It’s just about the money.

Politicians want to be the judge, And determine what’s best for me,
But having them decide like this, Steals a big bite from my liberty.

The research has all been done For our next national threat,
The obesity problem swaggers on, And will be our biggest one yet.

So when smokers are all gone, And life seems nice and sweet,
Get ready for taxes that will come on the fattening foods you eat.

They systematically tax us all, From gasoline to booze,
Prepare yourselves for another tax, When you’re standing in my shoes.

If you think that I sound paranoid, Or want to view this as a joke,
Just wait until the “buck” is passed, And your Big Mac goes up in smoke.

Thomas and Sandra Hookham
Ontario

Original posting is from this post

I have a desk job you could say, and this morning in this room where I sit and do most of the work I do nowadays, it was a balmy 29 degrees. I get that word “balmy” from Bluelips, this morning she discribed her garage as balmy at 28 degrees.

First let me tell why I choose to work out here with the conditions as they are.

1. I smoke out here cause Ma wont let me smoke in the house.
2. My mornings start early, some times as early as three am.
   No way could I work in the other house without waking Ma up.
3. I like to see what is going on around the place early and when it is quiet.

All these reasons take on new meanings in the winter, then I could add:

4. I smoke less when it is cold.
5. It’s usually too hot in the house and gas heat is not as nice as wood heat in my opinion.

After another trip down both memory lane and my ramp porch I decided to add another reason to thouroughly enjoy the winter here.

6. The ability to Practice down-hill skiing, and/or forward rolls, whichever comes first.
   forward rolls are wayyyy ahead.

What does this have to do with Hidden Prairie?. Not at thing, zip…

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Some folks will remember the newsletter I published years ago before Hidden Prairie’s conception. In it was my personal column “Granpaw’s Ramblin’s”, there are still remnants of it in various places on the internet, but the thing about my column was that I sat down and wrote whatever it was that was in my mind at that moment. Being under a deadline, I had to finish the column with sometimes not too much thought given to the ramifications of the words. Sometimes it didn’t make much sense to anyone else but myself, and more often than not, the subject had no real importance anyway.

Hence this post…Notice the new category, from now on I’m going to try to remember to check “chewin the fat” when my posts become like the ramblins of yesteryear.
Click to enlarge image.

The next morning, after the occupants of the bathroom had cleared out, I took a closer look at what the job might entail. I then arrived at the conclusion that all I needed to do was to turn off the water supply, empty the tank, and replace the fill valve, which was the leaking culprit in the first place, just as I had deduced the day before.
So I drove the 6 miles into town to the hardware store and picked up a new adjustable fill valve (15 bucks or so), a new flexible supply line (another 8 bucks), and a supply shutoff that I thought I might need.
To the reader(s), remember, I said adjustable fill valve.

Side note to the weather man/woman
You say there is a drought here in the northwoods, I jumped in my truck and realized my window had been open just a crack on the drivers side
I spent the next three hours soaking wet in the seat of my overalls.
That ain’t no drought!

I know this is awful boring to someone visiting here and I appologize for that but it’s my journal and I put down the times as I see them

I returned home, turned off the water supply and patiently sponged the water out of the bottom of the tank. Took the new adjustable fill valve and put in in place, hooked up the bright shiny new supply line and turned the water back on…Now wait a minute, why is that adjustable fill valve trying to shoot out of the top of the tank?.. Because, it’s adjustable dummy!

sigh

To be more precise it is an “adjustable anti-siphon fill valve” Oh, yeah, that explains it, ok then take a look at the directions (yeah right)..correction, put on your magnifiying glasses and try to read the directions..just barely discernable…Ok..now.
Start again, remove all the fixtures I previous installed, and then sponge out the remaining water again, then set tab “D” to one inch above the whatever that thing is, then remove valve and tighten nut “B” at the next available locking ring and install the thing back where it was.
By this time I had it down to a science. I re-installed the adjustable anti-siphon fill valve as directed, I did not over tighten the locking nuts, as directed, I turned the water supply back on and opened the supply valve, as directed. Voila!, no leaks! great news!
The end.
What was that you said about the carpet honey?

sigh

Author’s note:

This article, both chapters combined, appears in edited form in Helium.com’s “creative writing” channel, in the humor in life section.

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For about 2 weeks now there has been an annoying (to say the least) leak in the bathroom. It all started with the amount of water the tank reserved for the flush becoming more than normal. This led to a longer than normal flush, but it was a flush nonetheless.

---

My wife, bless her heart, could only hear the difference as she cannot see and commented on it hourly for the first two days. She took it upon herself late one night to stick a plunger in the bowl when she thought the water was not going down.
Needless to say this led to an overflow, because true to form the above average amount of water completed it’s journey out over the rim of the bowl, instead of down the drain as it would have had she not inserted the plunger.

Our bathroom in that end of the trailer is narrow consisting of a sink, shower stall and toilet, comparative to the space of an average sized washroom on a Greyhound bus..
If such a thing still exists

After the floor in the bathroom had been wiped clean, I was notified that the toilet had “overflowed” and that I had been wrong in my previous assessment of the situation, I settled into my usual analytic mode (procrastination), while I ran over the “cause and effects” possibilities in my head. I might add that my wife, again, bless her heart, does not subscribe to “cause and effect”..If it quacks like a duck and so forth…But I get ahead of my tale…Unbeknown to the both of us, a substantial portion of water had worked it’s way under the wall and out into the next room, under the carpet in the living room where it lurked undetected for approximately 24 hours.

Continued….tomorrow with episode one.